10001 Nokesville Road, Manassas, VA 20110
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Virginia Rufner

Virginia Moseley Rufner

Sunday, January 29th, 1956 - Wednesday, November 20th, 2019
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Virginia Moseley Rufner passed away early Wednesday morning, November 20, 2019, with her devoted husband of 45 years, Gary, steadfastly holding her hand. Virginia was a first-born daughter, an eldest sister, a devoted wife, a caring mother of two, a skilled legal secretary, an accomplished softball player, an occasional baseball coach, an opportunistic world traveler, and a person who appreciated and cultivated a life of love and family.
Within her family Virginia was the emblem of strength. Despite suffering the painful slings and arrows of body-wide cancer, she remained resilient and an infinite source of support and love. She always reveled in the successes of her husband and sons, conveying pride far beyond what she showed at her own achievements. She was the paragon of a loving mother.
Virginia was a force of nature. She was impressive. She was smart yet inquisitive, strong but also emotional, and she was unfailingly kind to animals. Her love of cats is legendary, as she owned and cared for almost a dozen feline family members over the years. She loved each cat’s personality, and she often called up cherished memories of Tiffany, Sir, Missy, Shilly, CJ, Maggie, Bubba, TC, Rudy, and Ellie.
Virginia was a learner. With unflinching determination and expert time-management – plus a little help in Astronomy class – she worked to finish her college degree, more than three decades after starting it. She was a vastly intelligent person who knew the value of asking questions, and the importance of skeptically evaluating the answers.
Virginia was a traveler. She especially loved cruises, and she and Gary took them regularly to travel the Caribbean, the St. Lawrence River, Bermuda, or either coast of Mexico. In 2018, she organized a five-day vacation to Iceland in hopes of seeing the Northern Lights, which she did – twice. In September of 2019, Virginia planned a 10-day family vacation to Alaska, the memories of which will last a lifetime.
When at home in Centreville, she delighted in sitting on the swinging bench on the covered porch, looking out into the woods and making comments about what the squirrels were doing. She spent her final summer residing in her long-awaited second home, overlooking the waters of a Southwest Florida canal. She took great joy in watching what swam by and telling everyone about it.
Virginia was a pillar of her family. Every holiday season, the entire family looked forward to playing the games she would invent for the big gathering. Laughter and fun were invariably the results. She was clever and funny, and she enjoyed it when others were the same. In her last photograph, she insisted on sipping milk while her family posed around her, just for the comedic effect. She loved it.
Virginia, a.k.a. Mom, is terribly missed. She is survived by her cat Puma, her husband Gary, of Centreville, Va., her son Jason and daughter-in-law Tara, both of Centreville, Va., and her son Chris, of Spring, Tx. Her two sisters, Nancy-Lynn Wilson of Fairfax, Va., and Barbara Moseley of Rixeyville, Va., miss their older sister very much.

A Memorial Service will be held on Saturday, December 7, 2019 at 10:00 AM at Saint Andrew Lutheran Church, 14640 Soucy Place, Centreville, VA 20120.

Following the Memorial Service, the Rufner Family invites all mourners to gather at the family home:
6620 Smiths Trace
Centreville, VA 20120

In lieu of flowers, Virginia requested that memorial donations be made to help cats in foster care with Animal Allies at P.O. Box 7040, Fairfax Station, VA 22039-7040, telephone 703-940-9183, website AnimalAlliesVA.org/donate, so that more cats might be loved the way Virginia would love them.

Please sign the guestbook at www.bakerpostfh.com.
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Service Details

  • Service

    Saturday, December 7th, 2019 | 10:00am
    Saturday, December 7th, 2019 10:00am
    Saint Andrew Lutheran Church
    14640 Soucy Place
    Get Directions: View Map | Text | Email


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Private Condolence
Megan Osinski sent flowers to the family of Virginia Moseley Rufner.
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Jason Rufner

Posted at 01:50pm
It’s not fair. It’s not fair that my mom isn’t still alive. She should still be alive, and living in her new house in Florida, and doting on her cat, and texting everyone about whatever strange Florida thing swam up the canal that morning.

It isn’t fair. It isn’t going to become fair. Please don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t really want to be here. None of us should be here, at least not for this. Right now this sanctuary should be hosting bingo or potluck or something…because my mom should STILL be here.

But she’s gone, and it’s not fair.

But my mom always taught me that life isn’t fair. She taught me that what matters is how you deal with it.

I’m very lucky. My mom taught me a lot about life - which, makes sense. She’s the one who gave it to me.

My mom taught me how to drive. She taught me how to bunt. She taught me my numbers in Spanish, from uno to diez, which was almost all she knew en español.

My mom taught me that trust is something that’s earned, and that once it’s lost it’s hard to get it back - so you might as well keep it. She taught me that people may be good or bad - but you should always be good to people. She taught me that cats are people too.

I remember a lot about my mom. She was impressive, and she certainly impressed a lot of things on me. She taught me how to take pride in the accomplishments of others, and how to persevere in our own accomplishments. I remember how happy she was when I went back to college and earned my degree, eight years after starting it. I hope she knows how proud I was when she finished her own college degree after only about 30 years.

It’s not fair.

My mom had so much life. One of her bucket-list items was to see the Northern Lights - and one of my favorite memories is from when we were in Iceland last year, and I called her in the middle of a cold night to come out and see this curtain of shimmering dancing light overhead.

Seeing her out there in the cold, just a coat on so she could look up and take in something amazing that she’d never seen before - and then hearing her thank me for dragging her out there in the cold - is something I’ll never forget. It really teaches me who she was.

It’s not fair.

My mom should be making games for the Christmas party, planning her Australia vacation, and cross-stitching something about cats. She should be alive and well in her early 60s and living like a snowbird, but she isn’t. The fact is that my mom died because she got cancer that was discovered too late, and that’s not fair.

But my mom also taught me that life, unfair though it may be, does go on - and I feel prepared for the rest of my life because of all the things my mom taught me.

My mom was an eager teacher, an unrelenting supporter, and a highly intelligent, inquisitive and discerning person. To me, she is a force of nature. The wonderful thing about forces of nature is that they span the Universe forever.

Thank you, Mom. Thank you for everything you always taught me. Just like I told you last time I saw you: We love you, and we will make you proud.

Butch Bryant

Posted at 06:13pm
I only met Virginia once, but I've been friends with her husband, Gary, since high school. Virginia was battling cancer when I first met her many years ago, but you'd never know it. She was positive, upbeat, and a joy to be around. Her attitude was to be commended, as it takes a positive attitude and a sense of humor to battle that dreaded disease. I was one of the lucky survivors, but sometimes I wonder just how lucky I was when I see the devastation the disease can cause, not just to the patients, but to their loved ones as well. Survivor guilt? Maybe. But it just really upsets me to see "the good ones" taken. And Virginia was one of the good ones! Blessings and prayers to the entire family in their grief.

Rebecca Wehausen

Posted at 11:20am
To the Rufner Family, my deepest condolences. Virginia was a co-worker and friend and we sat near each other in the Fairfax office. We were separated by departments in the Reston office, but I always enjoyed talking with her. She was spunky, truthful and funny. I admired her strength and her love of her family. We always shared our family stories with each other. My daughters went to Centreville High School and when the brick wall went up near the football field and I saw the Rufner family brick I took a picture of it and showed it to Virginia. She appreciated it very much. I am so sorry to hear of her passing. My prayers go out to you all. She will be truly missed.

Rebecca Wehausen

Erin Boland

Posted at 11:38am
Virginia (or “VA” as I’d always call her) was my friend and coworker. She was someone I trusted and admired for so many reasons, and when she became sick, I also came to see her as a warrior. Over the years, VA and I often talked about her handsome husband, his beautiful “radio voice,” and her boys. It was apparent to all that she loved her family more than anything in the world. I’ll betcha she’s kicking butt in heaven just as she did on earth. Warm hugs to VA’s family and all who knew and loved her.
With love,
Erin Boland

Megan Osinski

Posted at 10:46am
To Virginia's family: My thoughts and prayers are with you during this time. Virginia was always pleasant, kind, and so thoughtful. I have to admit, I cried when I heard the news. When I first came to OFP, it was a hard transition for me, after working for the government for so long. Virginia was always helpful in steering me in the right direction (some times literally), or even just making me feel "at home". Please know that I will be praying for your family. May God continue to keep you strong, and give you peace.

Megan Osinski, co-worker

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